Tallulah’s Tail – er, Tale

Jack gets inside the head of foster-cat Tallulah –

Tallulah (for that had immediately become her name) arrived at the bookstore with her three kittens from the shelter for distressed pets. Hmmm, she thought as she spied the other animals – Zora the lab, Bert the terrier, Valkittie the elderly cat and Owen and Bob the black and white young cats. But a door closed and she settled down to motherly duties. Every morning the door would open and the humans brought her fresh food and water; every day passed with kitten feeding and cleaning. Eventually the kittens left one by one and she didn’t mind one bit – they had begun to steal her food before she could get to it.

After the last kitten left the humans began leaving her door open from time to time and she could explore the rest of the house. My goodness – so many books in the place!

IMG_3627Time to position herself in the hierarchy of animals. Flipping her long-haired tail like a feather boa, she set out. Valkittie proved impossible to dislodge from her overall managerial position but the other cats adjusted appropriately, which left the dogs. It was just about then that she felt a familiar urge. Bob and Owen seemed like nice boys – but strangely uninterested in her allure. Now Bert, the terrier – he’s a real man. Could he be the one?

Alas, no. It seems cross-breeding won’t work.

The cat-flap? Of course! A world of furry men await!

That’s how she met the muscular black tom from the gym next door, who worked out and thus could leap the yard fence in a single bound – ah, bliss. He said he’d stick by her and show her a good time. But, no – just like the other one, once she’d given her all, he doesn’t come round any more.

Then one of the humans put her in the box she’d arrived in all those weeks before and she went for a trip. Oh, so sleepy – then awake and back in the box again. Such a palaver and just a bit stiff and sore. And somehow… lighter.

Here I sit and wait!

Here I sit and wait!

So, here she sits and waits to see what will happen next. Maybe somewhere out there is someone with room in his/her heart and home for a beautiful young Tallulah who doesn’t get those urges any more, but just loves to get petted by any passing human. Tallulah makes an attractive desk accessory and elegantly enhances any room decor. All she wants is a human to call her own. Could it be you?

Arachnophobiblia?

As I come from a Northern European country, my experience of scary creepy crawly things is fairly limited: Margaret Thatcher, mostly. But I had a baptism of fire (actually fire ants) when I first arrived in the US. I discovered not only fire ants but banana spiders and other six- and eight-legged critters I never was able to put a name to, because they didn’t exist in the Old World. Suffice it to say that I’m a lot more nervous about these things now that I live here permanently–and since I learned that Tennessee, which is on our bookstore’s western flank, is home to almost every kind of poisonous spider known to humanity.

 

So when I was suckered into upgrading our bookstore’s basement (see my previous post) so we could put “another few bookshelves” down there, I was aware that there were a few straggly cobwebs. It seemed likely that there might even be an occasional confrontation, but it wasn’t until I began to replace the windows that things got serious.

As I installed each new window frame, I sprayed expanding foam into the crevices. After finishing the first two, I went up into the house to have my lunch. On my return, I was confronted with a whole herd of spindly legged spiders with swollen white joints and bodies hanging in the webs.

 

These things looked seriously scary, like evil snowflakes, but they weren’t moving. My assumption was that the foam had driven them out of their hiding places and perhaps given them a rather nasty death. But Wendy, being an academic, decided that ‘crowd sourcing’ on FaceBook would give us a more definitive answer.

 

Our neighbor and bookstore cleaner extraordinaire, Heather (while on an excursion in Asheville, even) found a match to the picture I’d posted of our spider. Lo and behold – it was officially named a Cellar Spider, and the white stuff was a fungal infection! I’m kind of sorry for them, having just got over a nasty cough myself, but don’t feel as guilty as when I thought I’d zapped them with the foam.

Now I wonder, did they catch this infection all at once or were they born with it inside them and it gradually developed? They are different sizes and yet they all have it; here’s what appears to be the tribal elder –

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I should finally say that I’m generally amenable to spiders (as long as they’re not right in my face) as I know they keep less desirable beasties under control. However, Wendy, normally a circle of lifer and a gentle Quakerish soul, is terrified of spiders and has now decided the basement bookstore elements are mine to supervise. I feel more work coming on….