Two Lovely Things

This fine Saturday morning I am sitting in my friend’s house in Glen Ariff, N Ireland, drinking tea and valuing books. Liz runs a camping and ceilidh barn, but is rarely here because she’s trotting the world as a storyteller. I think she’s in England today.

The view from my bedroom window this morning

Sitting in Liz’s space surrounded by bookshelves, I’m going through her rather extensive collection. As a former librarian, Liz received a lot of books as presents over the years from places where she’s told stories.Some of them are worth quite a bit, and I am having fun plying my old trade as a bookslinger.

Liz is eyeing a bit of downsizing for her caretakers’ flat at the barn. The barn is divided into three bits: Liz’s private space, the dorm and services for the guests, and a studio for ceilidhs and workshops, sessions, etc. You have to go outside to get between the three.

Of course it’s drizzling today, so I made myself a cuppa tea from the ceilidh barn stash, carried it over to the flat, and changed into my comfy slipper socks. It took this PhD with two master’s degrees about an hour to realize that, instead of changing to shoes and dashing through the rain to make another cuppa each time, I could bring the milk and sugar to Liz’s place and use her kettle. Not much gets by me. I think I’m on my ninth cup of tea, so perhaps my brain is sloshing.

One shelf done, 27 to go….
When I lived in Scotland I wrote a column for a US paper about life overseas and they were collected into this sweet little book, my first. I’ve written nine since then with some major publishers even, but the first is always special!

Some amazing titles live on these crowded bookshelves. And of course there’s the lovely moment when I found one of the books I’d written. Pride filled my heart – until I valued it online. We won’t talk about that.

If you want to be in on the book sale once it starts, leave a comment on this blog post and we will contact you when the time comes. Some books will be listed on eBay, plus there will be a barn sale and possibly an online FB Marketplace sale as well. We will let you know.

The lucky tomes that may get to travel the world via eBay, based on their desirability and value

Now, a quick dash to the toilet and back to the bookshelves with cup number ten.

Destined for FB Marketplace, or perhaps a nice ‘buns and books’ barn sale?

The Monday Book: TOTO by AJ Hackwith

I’m not sure the Monday book is returning as a regular feature, but this book is a hoot. I got it out of the library in a whim while asking for an interlibrary loan.

Toto is, if you were wondering, a novel. It’s written from, you guessed it, Toto’s point of view. And Toto is the most sarcastic, entitled, bemused, cynical little dog you ever met. He’s hysterical. If you took all the traits of toxic masculinity and excessive entitlement, and put them into a cute little scruffy dog, it would be Toto. What would be annoying to deal with in real life is somehow adorable in a wee dug (Scottish for dog, sorry) with a lot to say, except nobody has been listening before.

Take this paragraph on the opening page: … when a gang of grown men in shorts and suspenders and holding candy cane clubs stepped forward and started serenading Dorothy about a league of traditional masculinity and men’s rights, I was inclined to slow fade into the bushes. I don’t care if they call themselves something cute like the “Tartpatch Gang.” Take it from a dog who has accomplished many calculated hijinks with his stirling reputation intact–you can get away with a lot of terrible shit when you’re small and cute.

As you call tell, this novel combines the movie and the book for best comedic effect. Also, Toto drops a fair few F bombs along with some earthier words. Finally, Toto–oh ok, Hackwith–is not writing beautiful sentences, just telling a story. Words repeat, things are choppy. It sounds, more or less, like a smart dog who has not benefited from proper English classes.

Not gonna tell you anything about the ending of course; if you want to cut through a little of the sugary sweetness this Christmas, take a chance on Toto. Just don’t even think about reading this to your kids.

An enthusiastic two paws up!