PAXTON’S PUSHING UP DAISIES!

toilet flowersToday’s blog is the character list for our upcoming murder mystery on Friday, May 13 starting at 7 pm. Wendy has way too much fun writing these. Jack fears she will snap one of these days on the line between fiction and reality…..

The bookstore lawn has long been the talk of the town. Some find their toilet flower container post-modern ironic, others call it disgusting. Then there’s the English garden herbarium, and something called heirloom seeds brought over from a Quaker Peace Garden in some remote Scottish village? All very quaint, but hardly up to standards. So the garden clubs have been sent in to help. John Bach, bookstore owner, finds himself caught between feuding clubs: the Superior Gardener Club of the Ladies of the United Methodists, and the Gardener Superiors of the Southern Baptist Ladies’ Society, Eastern Division, Virginia Chapter.

It’s gonna get ugly, and that’s not just the designs and still life in pot arrangements and perennials on a plate they bring to the meeting. When the Methodist president goes face-down into the fertilizer, whodunit? Come join the fun in PAXTON’S PUSHING UP DAISIES, the 15th Murder Mystery held at the Little Bookstore of Big Stone Gap.

When you see the part you want to play, send Wendy a PM on Facebook, or comment here. We regret to say that all parts are assigned, so if you’ve not already asked for one, you are welcome to watch but we can’t offer you a live role. Also if a part is in bold, it has an assigned person. Thanks!

Superior Garden Club President (Methodist) – Paxton

Garden Club Mother Superior (Baptist) Peony  Large – As bombastic as the scent of honeysuckle, and just as strangling. Can you get a word in edgewise? Perhaps she’s the intended victim – people would certainly stand in line to do things to her with a trowel. VIRGIE

Assistant to Superior Garden club Baptist President, Violet Shrink – She has good ideas, if you could hear her. How can anything bloom in the shadows? And is it true she and Paxton were best friends in high school?

Earth Mom and fey Baptist, Hannah Hephzibah-Eleanora Smith – Never underestimate the power of Epsom Salts and good clean living digging in the dirt; but what else has she been digging up? VICKY

Loud Male Chauvinist Council Guy who keeps addressing everyone as ‘Dear’ Christopher Love – here to oversee the competition John Bach didn’t know he was running HARRY

Nerdy swinger just there to pick up girls: Jimmy – He’s like a bee in the flower garden, but maybe he’s the one getting stung (Jimmy Brown)

The Proper Horticulturalist, James, a widower – Is he one of the garden ladies’ fancy man, or does he really know that much about how to make something come to life? JAMES RYAN

Prepper, grow food while you still can, Primrose Evergreen – It’s all going to end badly, like, tomorrow. Of what use are flowers at the end of the world; produce ornamental edibles! Too bad she’s got the wrong idea about some of those poisonous blossoms.

Flirty girl, bimbo, Poppy Upster – Pushing up daisies? No, pushing up something else. Did Paxton’s husband really date her in college? SANDY

Peggy Dunn Good Bach – Margaret Bach, Girl Detective, brings her mom this time! She’s John Bach’s sister-in-law, this helicopter mom determined her little Daisy is getting in the Junior League, come blossom blight or high water. Her daughter will provide the winning garden design, or someone will die trying. The fact that Margaret isn’t interested in flowers is neither here nor there.

Hat saleslady, Ima Millner – Garden, schmarden, she just wants to sell hats and she’s got the wrong idea about this garden club thing. But maybe she’s got a couple of other wrong ideas as well; did she crash this party on purpose?

Sweetness and light to the point you want to drown her, Jonquil May– How can you not love this sweet child? Easy. Can anyone be this nice, or is she a plant? ERIN

Passive aggressive poisonous criticizer Ivy Sue Mac– “Oh, what an… innovative arrangement, dear.” If she said something nice to you, you’d know you had a terminal illness.

Overly enthusiastic gardener, Joy Abounder – The quintessential church lady; when she says “Bless you” it sounds as though it starts with “F” JERRY LOU BROWN

Social Climber Hyacinth Bucket – She came from the dirt, so it’s only natural she should use gardening to rake her way to the top; was Paxton in her way?

 

Isabella has a few Things to Say

isabellaWell h’lo there! I’m Isabella. I came from a large family of cats – fourteen or so of us – that got dispersed because Dad died and Mom was kinda fed up with the whole thing.

I’m spayed and I keep my sleeping area neat as a pin. I’m so glad to finally have one of my own to keep! Used to share with three of my sisters, and they were always sticking their feet in my eyes.

I wear a tuxedo all the time, but I’m not stuck up or dressy or anything. My foster mom here says the tuxedo is right for me ’cause I’m not very feminine. Or maybe she said feline. She says I run around so much, I’m like a lightning bug on cocaine.

I’m really good at catching lightning bugs. And flies. And dust beams. Foster Dad says I’m their tiny dancer ’cause I do the most graceful pir- piroue – flips. He says I’m more fun to watch than television.

At night when things slow down I like to wait until Mom’s asleep and then sneak down and get between her shoulder and her chin. It’s my favorite place to sleep. When she wakes up and finds me there she laughs. She says no one would ever believe I could hold still long enough to sleep.

isabellaMom asked me what I wanted in a forever home, and I’ve given it a lot of thought between runs. I want a place where it’s okay to climb up on things. I LOVE being queen of the cat castle in the mystery room here at the bookstore! It would be fun to have another cat or two around, and I don’t mind if there’s dogs. It would be nice to have some older kids to play with, but I’m not gonna get dressed up in a bonnet, ‘kay? I play; I don’t get played with. And NOBODY puts Bella in a stroller!

Other than that I don’t much mind what kind of home it is, so long as it’s forever and the people are nice and don’t expect me to ride around on their shoulders. Laps are cool; shoulders and getting carried, not so much. Why ride when you can run?

So maybe you’re looking for a good mouser inside (I’d be lonely in a barn) or a friendly cat to play with who isn’t gonna be all co-dependent and everything. That would be ME!

Come by the bookstore. Ask for Isabella. See ya!adoptables 036