Teaching Facebook a Lesson

Our bookstore attracts free spirits, intellectuals, and weirdos–sometimes all in one person. So of course some bookstore friends and I have enjoyed inventing a new game; it’s what creative, bibliophilic, dangerously over-educated and slightly maladjusted people do.

It started after the latest hoopla about “the big F is ruining our privacy and we are being sold as products to marketers via those little pop-up ads” escalated into “Homeland Security is watching you.”

Yeah. The government’s clear-headed efficiency dealing with every project undertaken to date has me quaking in terror about the laser beam of intellectual resources targeted at ferreting out anarchists like me.

Actually, I’m not an anarchist; I voted Democrat in the last election (in case you were confused on that point). But since I live in the Bible Belt’s buckle, that makes me look like an anarchist to some of the neighbors. I don’t mind. They usually send over fresh-baked muffins or rolls with their religious flyers. And when I leave flyers for the Democratic party on their front porch, I anchor them with a jar of homemade chutney.

It’s easy for the five thousand or so of us living here in Big Stone to remember that politics is politics, family is family, and ain’t nobody out there beyond the mountains who loves us as much as we love each other. The same cannot be said of The Facebook Community. I suppose when you get a billion or so people together, there are bound to be disagreements that become hard to settle. But the idea that someone, somewhere is keeping an eye on who disagrees with whom, about what, and why, is not nearly so plausible as that a whole bunch of someones (or, more to the point, somethings) are keeping tabs on what we talk about and what we “like” so they can sell us more of the same.

So some friends and I have started the game of “therapy posting.” Once a week, we get on our timelines and write statuses (stati?) like “package tour to Uzbekistan, small animal husbandry, 1900s German cookie molds, cute memes of fuzzy kittens, sourcing fertilizer, the collected works of Karl Marx and Charles Schultz, and yoga for parrots.”

Go on, try it; it’s fun! And it confuses the heck out of those little pop-up ads. Mine went from “promote your new book in ten easy steps” and “Petsmart” to “10 household supplies you should hoard” and “Lowe’s.” (I guess the Apocalypse Soon crowd would need a lot of building supplies….)

My friend Rachel posted a mess of stream-of-consciousness random ideas, and her pop-ups went from “a message from the First Lady” to “buy Sarah Palin’s autobiography.” She said she wouldn’t play any more after that.

So maybe search engines and cookies are easier to confuse than real people. Here in Wise County we live side by side, screaming obscenities at each other in the political arena, then sitting down to casseroles. ‘Twas ever thus in small towns, where the mayor could be your mortal sworn enemy, your church organist, and in all likelihood married to someone with whom you play on a ball team. And you’re all gonna meet at the bookstore anyway.

Facebook could learn a lot from us, if they were REALLY listening.

Tying Up Loose (week)Ends

Today’s post is just pulling together a few loose threads to tie into the weekend.

First, let me remind everyone that CAPTION CONTEST III (scroll down to July 8) closes next week. If you haven’t entered yet, take a look at the winsome photo of a kitten surrounded by books, and have fun. First prize is a free copy of The Little Bookstore of Big Stone Gap: a memoir of friendship, community and the uncommon pleasure of a good book.

(BTW the kitten in question, who was known as Mr. Edwards while with us–from our Limited Edition Little House Summer Series Foster Collection–has been adopted and is now being spoiled rotten under his new name: Karl Pilkington. His forever family said their permanently-worried facial expressions were too similar to ignore.)

Second, I blogged a list of fun bibliophile sites online last week, and then found another that night. Goodwill Librarian is on Facebook, posting great photos and memes. Kimberly–the GW–also runs Good Reads Missoula, a website dedicated to books and book lovers. (Google it as for some reason it’s not posting right here.) They’re great places to visit on a Friday–or any day! Pretty and erudite at the same time.

Next, for those who looked at yesterday’s “I’m looking for a book” hints: nice job! I guessed Life of Pi too, for the first customer, who said “It’s about a guy in a lifeboat.” But of all things, he was looking for Jerome K. Jerome’s Three Men in a Boat! (This is a comic novel about a boating holiday, published in 1889.)

Customer hint:”All these people are mad at each other, because their dad gave away his land.” Jane Yolen got closest with her guess, King Lear. The lady was looking for A Thousand Acres by Jane Smiley. (Her next statement actually abbreviated a frustrating search: “It was a movie on Lifetime.” Well why didn’t you say so? Now we can skip a few false trails.)

“It’s about a woman whose husband dies, and she writes it all down.” Joan Didion, A Year of Magical Thinking, is what the customer wanted. I must admit to bookstore keeper snobbery here, because I thought anyone with literary sensibilities suited to Joan Didion would be able to ask for her by name. Instead, I suggested first  The Geography of Love by Glenda Burgess, then Carole Radziwill’s What Remains.

The woman shook her head. “This man keeled over at the table, and his wife was already a writer.” At that moment I began to suspect she was toying with me, because anyone who knew that much MUST know Joan Didion’s work, but in fact the lady just couldn’t remember the book’s name. C’est la bookselling vie.

“It’s about a girl who gets raped, except everybody blames her.” Speak is a great book on this subject (which as comments point out, is all too frequent) but the customer wanted We Were the Mulvaneys by Joyce Carol Oates.

It’s about this guy’s dog. Easy Peasy: Marley and Me. But just to separate it from the rest of the pack, I asked the gentleman requesting the book, “Who dies, the man or his dog?” This eliminated London before the search started.

Now, see that zombie thing? We went several rounds. I started with graphic novels; let’s face it, the kid was a goth and we do judge books by their covers. Nope. I won’t bore you with all the other wrong guesses. Believe it or not, what the lad wanted was I, Robot by Isaac Asmiov. His teacher made it an extra credit reading assignment, saying something about (remember, this came via the kid’s filter) people not caring about their feelings and letting machines do all the work and sort of living while being dead while the machines were coming to life.

Yes, it’s a new description of a classic text, but hey, I’m just glad the boy was willing to do an extra credit reading assignment. I do kinda hope his teacher never tries to describe Moby-Dick to him, though, because he’ll come in asking for Jaws.

And the final loose end: WETS FM is rebroadcasting a Community Forum interview I did about bookstores, at 7:30 Saturday morning and 2:30 Sunday afternoon. If you want to hear it, go to www.wets.org at these times and click on the listen now button at the top of the screen. The page that opens has all their channels (3 or 4 I think) and you just choose your preferred listening software. I think you can also download it via the website, but these programs are not archived.

Have a great weekend, everybody.