Category Archives: publishing

(updated) Young Pup Literary Critic Savages Author’s Latest Work

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a note from Jack: We normally put a blog up on Saturdays, but we’re waiting until Sunday today, for two reasons:

1) there’s been an outpouring of sympathy over the latest review of Wendy’s book (see below) and we want everyone to have a chance to weigh in; and

2) we are doing a Scottish festival this weekend and have time off Sunday, but not Saturday. So we’ll fill you in on the fun Sunday. Meanwhile, if you can add any puns to the report below…. well, you’d not be barking up the wrong tree!

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My editor Nichole sent her friend Laura Yorke, who happens to be a literary agent, a copy of my book, just for Laura to have something to read on vacation. Laura has a new puppy at home. The rest, as they say, is history.

excerpt from CRITICS DIGEST—NYC, NY 25 Jan. 2013

In one of the most brutal attacks yet witnessed in the NYC literary scene, a young agent sank his teeth into a first-time author’s work and left no sentence unshredded.

“It’s the worst thing I’ve had in ages,” barked the agent. “Absolutely tasteless. Made my hackles rise.“

“He just ripped it to pieces,” said Laura Yorke, another agent who witnessed the reviewer at work. “Page by page, he tore through the whole thing with such obvious glee. I mean, he was practically frothing at the mouth.“

The agent in question is just a young pup on the scene, but has already developed quite a reputation regarding his keen nose for writing–not to mention his signature tooth-and-claw style. No doubt he will work many more writers over in this spineless fashion.

The author could not be reached for comment, but her husband said two bottles of red wine were missing from the liquor cabinet, and their bathroom door was locked from the inside.

New Year Resolutions Bookslingers Tend not to Make

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1. This year, I resolve to keep my manicure perfect. No more scraping off old price stickers, lifting bits of unidentified goo from covers, picking off bits of melted candy from the children’s books. I will not allow them to get dirt trapped beneath from the books. Lovely fingernails will be my priority.

2. Be nicer when people start haggling with me over prices. After all, it’s a terrible economy, and that dollar for the pristine copy of “The Three Little Wolves and the Big Bad Pig” could be all that stands between this well-dressed, hair-highlighted woman with the perfect manicure and her last six packages of Raman Noodles. I can eat mac and cheese again tonight.

3. Exercise more. Tonight when the shop closes I’ll get on the treadmill, since the eight miles I covered walking the shop floor today isn’t really exercise. Nor is that “bend from the waist, pick up the stack of hardbacks, back and forth to the shelves as fast as I can go; repeat” thing that comprises about 2 hours of my day. And I have to work off those cheese-covered carbs, because I sold “Three Little Wolves” for 50 cents.

4. Get out there and find authors or artists to support with great in-store publicity and shelving displays at my own expense. I need to help develop single-person-focused events that build ego rather than community, because artists with unrealistic expectations of their place in the world are truly hard to find. I must beat the bushes, and devote more resources to this field of endeavor.*

5. Drink less coffee/tea/vodka. I don’t need it to get myself awake Saturday at 7 a.m. so I can get the shop floor cleared of books by opening time and make that cute display for the upcoming author signing. I don’t need it to make the customer who came in and needs to talk feel welcome and like I have time to listen to her at 11 a.m. I don’t need it to wake myself up at 3 p.m. after a vigorous physical day during which I stuffed a fiber bar in my mouth at lunch because the place was mobbed and my part-time student help didn’t show. And I don’t need it to stay awake at 7 p.m. during the author event, because this paranormal romance is well-edited and has such an innovative plot that I’m fascinated, despite that carb-heavy meal of mac and cheese I wolfed down from 6:32-6:34 p.m.

6. Spend more time in my shop. Ten hours a day six days a week really isn’t enough to get the feel of the place. I must make an effort to be there more often and take a livelier interest in its day-to-day workings.

*Authors and artists, don’t take personal offense. The world needs you! Many wise and wonderful creators understand what’s realistic and what isn’t — like Lisa Pell and Heather Volk and others who have been a pleasure to work with. But, as one small bookstore owner and I discussed recently, we average five people per week asking to do signings or display items. Not all of them are cued up–or polite.